yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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