Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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