Betty ford says i'm here all night
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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