i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize