I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize