Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
The best revenge is premature balding
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
