OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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