Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
