She announced her abortion via fbk
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize