Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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