Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
pop tarts are not kleenex
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
