On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
