I heard we made out
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
