Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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