please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
You are a genius and a whore.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize