Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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