The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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