If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
