so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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