i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
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Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
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She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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