Do you still have your period?
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
