Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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