Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
It's blow job season.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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