Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Randomize
