Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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