I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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