is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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