You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
