We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Do you still have your period?
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
