their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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