I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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