My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
