Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
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