too bad you live with your parents still
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize