2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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