Texts From Last Night

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  (813): View more from Florida

  I'm fucking your sister right now.

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  You motherfucker

  (813): View more from Florida

  She's next.

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  (813): I'm fucking your sister right now. (1-813): You motherfucker (813): She's next. http://tfl.nu/gaup
  Replies (153) Good night (66370) Bad night (3768)
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  (323): View more from California

  I totes stole your whore crown.

  (239): View more from Florida

  With great power comes great responsibility.

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  (323): I totes stole your whore crown. (239): With great power comes great responsibility. http://tfl.nu/gvmp
  Replies (57) Good night (5977) Bad night (690)
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  (442): View more from California

  seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong

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  (442): seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong http://tfl.nu/rvkg
  Replies (16) Good night (1604) Bad night (3665)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.

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  (902): Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight. http://tfl.nu/0w7l
  Replies (25) Good night (4459) Bad night (595)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger

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  (540): I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger http://tfl.nu/crtx
  Replies (37) Good night (4315) Bad night (811)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.

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  (978): we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now. http://tfl.nu/2hw3
  Replies (36) Good night (4426) Bad night (772)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke

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  (802): i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke http://tfl.nu/r62l
  Replies (7) Good night (1016) Bad night (4256)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of

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  (248): He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of http://tfl.nu/1krw
  Replies (10) Good night (3614) Bad night (934)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.

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  (617): My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning. http://tfl.nu/kt95
  Replies (24) Good night (5399) Bad night (1499)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.

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  (508): NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY. http://tfl.nu/zzc9
  Replies (6) Good night (3070) Bad night (930)
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  (518): View more from New York

  He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.

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  (518): He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong. http://tfl.nu/r133
  Replies (2) Good night (1293) Bad night (688)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you

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  (713): I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you http://tfl.nu/33e4
  Replies (7) Good night (555) Bad night (1037)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.

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  (414): Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital. http://tfl.nu/5fyf
  Replies (3) Good night (753) Bad night (1258)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  I have a surprise for you

  (1-254): View more from Texas

  Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!

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  (254): I have a surprise for you (1-254): Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy! http://tfl.nu/af5l
  Replies (5) Good night (2401) Bad night (540)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?

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  (804): Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics? http://tfl.nu/u5k0
  Replies (2) Good night (382) Bad night (530)

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