Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.