so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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