sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
