wrigley field is MILF paradise
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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