this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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