she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
How drunk are you?
Completed.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
