yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
