Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize