he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I intend to get homeless drunk
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Randomize
