I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Couch. On fire.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
