it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
