you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
