I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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