I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize