He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
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